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Basic Etiquette for the Gentlemen and the Ladies

jingwen@2004-12-06 06:55

Basic Etiquette (quoted from Daniel Pool's What Jane Austen Ate and Charles Dickens Knew, pp. 54-56)
The Gentleman
1. In riding horseback or walking along the street, the lady always has the wall.
2. Meeting a lady in the street whom you know only slightly, you wait for her acknowledging bow- then and only then may you tip your hat to her, which is done using the hand farthest away from her to raise the hat. You do not speak to her - or to any other lady - unless she speaks to you first.
3. If you meet a lady who is a good friend and who signifies that she wishes to talk to you, you turn and walk with her if you wish to converse. It is not "done" to make a lady stand talking in the street.
4. In going up a flight of stairs, you precede the lady (running, according to one authority); in going down, you follow.
5. In a carriage, a gentleman takes the seat facing backward. If he is alone in a carriage with a lady, he does not sit next to her unless he is her husband, brother, father, or son. He alights from the carriage first so that he may hand her down. He takes care not to step on her dress.
6. At a public exhibition or concert, if accompanied by a lady, he goes in first in order to find her a seat. If he enters such an exhibition alone and there are ladies or older gentlemen present, he removes his hat.
7. A gentleman is always introduced to a lady - never the other way around. It is presumed to be an honor for the gentleman to meet her. Likewise a social inferior is always introduced to a superior.
8. A gentleman never smokes in the presence of ladies.
The Lady
1. If unmarried and under thirty, she is never to be seen in the company of a man without a chaperone. Except for a walk to church or a park in the early morning, she may not walk alone, but should always be accompanied by another lady, a man, or a servant. (Note: this would seem to have become a more general rule later in the century, as Austen's women are seen walking alone.)
2. Under no circumstances may a lady call upon a gentleman alone unless she is consulting that gentleman on a professional or business matter.
3. A lady does not wear pearls or diamonds in the morning.
4. A lady never dances more than three dances with the same partner.
5. A lady should never "cut" someone, that is to say, fail to acknowledge their presence after encountering them socially, unless it is absolutely necessary. By the same token, only a lady is ever truly justified in cutting someone: "a cut is only excusable when men persist in bowing whose acquaintance a lady does not wish to keep up." Upon the approach of the offender, a simple stare of silent iciness should suffice; followed, if necessary, by a "cold bow, which discourages familiarity without offering insult," and departure forthwith. To remark, "Sir, I have not the honor of your acquaintance" is a very extreme measure and is a weapon that should be deployed only as a last resort.
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红舞鞋@2004-12-06 07:55

我记得有女士离位或者接近餐桌等, 男士必须起立, 直到女士坐下后才能坐下. 至少以前英国是这样地.

不过现在没人这么做了...今天去朋友家吃饭. 我们几个女生进了客厅, 我看到一男生坐沙发上, 我叫他起立, 这是英国礼仪. 他回我一句"DONT BE STUPID"

= =+
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jsan@2004-12-07 23:27

Which century did this come from?
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iou1985@2004-12-08 03:33

看不懂。。。英文啊。。。偶的致命。。。
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jingwen@2004-12-08 05:45

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最初由 jsan 发布
Which century did this come from?
Didn't you see this is the quote from the book What Jane Austen Ate and What Charles Dickens Know?? Unless you don't know who Jane Austen or Charles Dickens is.......:rolleyes: It's 19th century England, the Regency and the Victorian era.
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Ammy@2004-12-11 08:42

These rules for men and women are sure tough for the 19th century. Luckily, I am not living in that era since I am breaking those rules every single day and hour.
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